Ye Ole' Goat

We once had a goat

who arrived on a boat 

from England, they did say.

And when we'd get near

he'd pop up one ear 

and glare till we went away.

He'd eat grass all day.

Wouldn't touch hay.

He was picky as Englanders are.

He walked mighty straight

with an uppity gait 

Not even a bump or a jar.

I thought in my mind, 

it would be so kind

if I loosened this goat just a bit.

He would feel right divine

with some homemade moonshine.

I confirmed my thought with a spit.

I waited till night

 and went by moonlight

to a place on top of the hill.

I knew it was there 

and with extreme care 

went right to my Grandpappy's still.

I took a brown jug,

which had a cork and a plug

and commenced on back down the trail.

Found the goat fast asleep,

so I didn't make a peep

while I filled up his waterin' pail.

As I went to bed,

good thoughts filled my head.

Might proud of my wonderful favor.

I'l go to sleep now.

Rest up for my bow

which would be all mine to savor. 

I woke with a jolt.

Out of bed with a bolt

'cause my daddy was doin' some cussin'.

I looked out the door.

My knees hit the floor

as I saw the reason for his fussin.

I saw that  ole' goat

who had started to bloat,

and a smile he did casually wear.

A grin I did hide.

He was on his backside

with his legs stickin' up in the air.